Having a new baby in the family is one of the most special times in a parent's life. As you look at that little one you think about the miracle of life and how special this little person is to you. Children are a precious resource and parenting a very important role.
In our role as parents, we are the prime educators of our children. It is important to remember that no two children are alike. Each child is a unique individual with strengths and weaknesses. Accept children for what each of them are and love them all unconditionally.
Most parents have no formal training for their parenting roles. Our knowledge comes from watching our own parents or other parents. We learn through experience, education, and observation. There is no one right way to parent. In addition, there are no perfect parents.
A growth and development chart will provide general information about what to expect a child to do at a particular age. The information is meant to be a "yardstick" by which to evaluate a child's progress. Remember, however, no two children grow and develop at the same rate. Don't compare your child's development with another child's. Each child grows and develops at his or her own pace.
If you notice that your child is delayed in a particular area, discuss the delays with your family physician. The physician can evaluate the child and make a determination for why the delay exists.
Babies vary in how much they cry. Some babies cry a lot and others not very much. A baby communicates his or her wants and needs to you by crying. Your baby may have one cry when he or she is hungry, another cry when he or she needs his or her diaper changed, and another when he or she is bored.
As a parent, you need to respond to your baby's cries so that the baby will develop a sense of trust and security. There is no need to believe that comforting, playing with, or caring for your baby will spoil him or her.
Many new parents are nervous when they bring their newborn home from the hospital. Trust in your own abilities to be a good parent.
You will have the most contact with your child and will be aware of changes in behavior and appearance. If you have a question or a concern, don't be afraid to ask about it. If you don't agree with the first answer you receive, ask several others and compare answers. A physician, health professional, and Family and Consumer Sciences Extension agent are good sources of information.
Deciding whether one or both parents will work will be a personal one made in consultation with others in the family. Going to work doesn't make you a "bad" parent just as staying home doesn't automatically make you a "good" parent. Whatever decision your family agrees upon will be the right one for you. Try not to feel guilty about the decision you make.
If you do choose to work outside the home, quality child care is important. Quality child care includes three important things:
With all the demands of parenthood, it is easy to put your own needs aside and concentrate exclusively on your new baby. You may be up late, up in the middle of the night, up at the crack of dawn, and up all day long. It doesn't take long to get tired and grouchy.
It is important to take time for yourself. Be sure to take care of your physical health. Try to get enough sleep. Eat a balanced diet. Do something that you especially enjoy.
When you feel bogged down, don't be afraid to ask for help. Your family and friends can be a wonderful support system.
Take the time to enjoy parenthood. Have fun playing with your baby. Hold, rock, and cuddle your baby. Talk to each other. Read stories. Go for walks. Sing. Play gentle games together like peek-a-boo or patty-cake, but only as long as you both enjoy the game.
Don't be afraid to show your love for your child. Remember it is the small things that count -- a smile, a hug, or just being there to listen and respond to needs.
Lois Clark, CFCS
OSU Extension Agent
Family and Consumer Sciences
Auglaize County
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